My second date with Jesus Christ (Part 1)

For my second date with Jesus Christ Almighty. I had my eyebrows threaded. And my hair done. And I lost a pound by taking a dump in the morning and not eating all day. Then I went to meet Jesus. I was so scared. I had so much to ask him. I wore my leather mini-skirt with the handcuff belt. I hoped Jesus would appreciate it.
I went to the Salvation Army. I walked past a gaggle of peole smoking at the front door. They were having an AA meeting inside.
I heard someone at the door whiste, at me. Must have been the handcuffs.
Went into the parking lot behind the Salvation Army. The asphalt was scarred and pocked. Had been paved in the fifties and never since, there were potholes so deep you could lose a baby in them.
I was so nervous. I had met him, and seen that he was a human man. It was all true. He is the son of God, born of man. He goes out of his way to be all human but his halo is pretty damn bright.
And I think he wants to get into my pants. That's kind of why I wore a skirt. In case something happens...we can do it anywhere. Well, he's homeless and I don't want to embarass him. What if he feels less manly if I invite him back to my place? Besides my brother would bother us anyway.